The blind leading the blind

What I want more for Christmas? What is it that ultimately drives me to write down at 10 pm before all the lights are up?

I want my heart to find its peace. I want my suffering to come to terms with reality and let me finally fall asleep at night. I wish that all the love incapsulated inside me from my past to gently dissolve and let the love for me, the love for life take charge.

I want the capacity to let go. The possibility to go to bed and wake up feeling anything but restlessness and without being consumed by a death fever. I want my heart to heal and bloom.

I want to fall in love for the right guy.

I want magic and glorious feelings, I want a love affair that lasts and that will fill me with energy and good and power and strength and that will be a guardian and a guide in my darkest moments.

But most of all, I want to find comfort. I want my heart to feel easy and free again. I want to wake up smiling. I want to open all doors and let air circulate. I wish magic will find a way back in my life and I wish I will see it and cherish it.

So please, set my heart free this Christmas. Release my demons, restore my powers, rewind my negativity, send me a new start. Make me lion hearted and fill me up with wanderlust and desire and strength and love for the unknown. Release my ghosts. Release me from my favorite ghost, favorite lover, favorite patron of the worst. Break my bad habits. Tighten my smile, so I won’t forget how to use it. Clean up my heart chambers. And make me some space for what’s the good to come.

I love you ♥

+ new photos in January
++ I hope all your wishes come true
+++ there will be a facebook page for this blog soon

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