“A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.” — Gore Vidal, Dead at 86

 

 

1. It’s preferable to be happy and tell the world about it, but there’s always so much visual poetry in sadness.

2. I don’t understand those people who make facebook profiles for their pets, gather around 300 friends, poke, comment and actually take the time to manage those profiles. Weirdos!!!

3. Better than say plant a tree, stop fucking cutting forests, so you wouldn’t have to plant anything in first place!

4. To every girl that dreams of dating a bearded uptown hipster with a bike – let me just remind you that when you take away the fixed-gear bike, the messenger bag, the scarf that’s worn year-round, the ironic t-shirt, the dumb shoes, the tattoos, the hat and the stupid beard, they ALL look the same. So, are you really in love with a guy or his accessories? Or is it that you’re in love with the whimsical idea of an urban lumberjack type who will go on “adventures” with you, meanwhile being perfectly content with doing what every other human being our age does: drinking and fucking? In reality, you don’t even know what you want. It’s an endless cycle of superficiality, facades, and stupid kids seeking affirmation from their peers.

5. Stop choosing McDonalds Unirea as a meeting place, e s p e c i a l l y when you don’t know what the other person looks like! For crying out loud, people always get confused in that spot – it’s crowded 24/7 so you might as well wear a sign around your neck pointing I’M HERE, LOSER!

6.Yesterday, during a short metro ride, I saw this terribly polished hipster dude reading FANTASTIC MAN magazine. (I only saw that recently in Belgium but I’m guessing they have it at selected press stores that sell Vogue here too – beware!) The guy was totally SNORTING into the paper, sinking between the covers and don’t get me wrong, I declare I’m nothing against hipsters OR fantastic hipsters who only want to know HOW to be more fantastic but seriously, what’s the next step? 10 ways to polish your nails better for fingering? How to express your inner beauty through eleven high end shirts? What Paul Smith socks are in and which are out? I’m sorry, it’s just too much. Boys in my life who are reading into this, just don’t ever try to get into those FANTASTIC MAN pants, socks or hipster glasses.

7. Never bitch about friends in front of friends. And if you do, make sure you use a super decent and classy tone.  So they don’t ever get mad at you, but at themselves. Don’t do it like Katy Perry, listen to me.

 

hotpants via Retrock
sweater via H&M
get your own zebra to a walk in the park + train ride. always works wonders.

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